Mum, Mom, or Maman? - bringing-up children bilingual

Written by Colette Brunton

From Reporter Issue 96

FAMILY AFFAIRS

Colette Brunton looks at bringing-up children bilingual.

For all of us expats the language has to be something of a problem. It's even more so for those who come here with children, or acquire them after arrival. There are several categories of couple to consider: very common are marriages in which one partner is French and the other from an English-speaking background; then there are cases where both parents are non-francophones from the same country-they may be Brits, Indians or, to cite an example I've just come across, Slovenians. Finally, there are couples who come from different non-francophone backgrounds. My friends here include a Dutch woman married to a Pole, and a Norwegian whose husband is Iranian.

"Two questions have to be decided"

Most people will agree that if they can bring their children up to be bilingual this will be a marked advantage in a globalised future. But two issues have to be decided. Firstly, what is to be the language background offered by the home and, secondly, what is to be done about schooling. Where I've been able to observe Anglo-French couples and their children I've often been surprised at how poor the youngsters' English often was. I put this to Jack, a British accountant with a French wife and on the Coast for 15 years, now with a son of 12 and a daughter of 9. "When I hear my two speak English," he admitted to me, "I feel uncomfortable. I'm afraid we just didn't make much of an effort. My French was already quite good when I got married. Mireille's English wasn't that hot and so French became the natural language of our home-and that went for our children as well. And all sorts of things reinforced this-they went into the �cole maternelle which is great for children's linguistic development, but in French only, of course, and then into the school system. On top of that, their immediate wider family was Mireille's lot, not mine back in the U.K. They go over to stay with their grandparents in Bideford every summer but they come back saying they find it hard understanding the locals-and even my dad who's got a lovely West Country burr but speaks very clearly."

Can this rather sad situation be avoided? "Certainly," said Jesper, a long-term assignee in Sophia, who married a local girl not long after coming here from Denmark and now has a son of 10. "Just talk to Fred in English for a while," suggested Jesper. "He speaks very well indeed, you'll hear, and it's the same with French." So how was that achieved? "Effectively, outside of Denmark English is my first language, both at work and socially. With Fred, we've followed the advice of a lot of people who've studied this question and operate on a one parent, one language principle. I speak to Fred in English, Marie-Ange in French, and we back that up with videos and computer games in both languages. He's also in the junior section of the CIV so he's got both English- and French-speaking friends. I have to admit that round the table sometimes the conversation of the three of us is a bit of a mishmash." That could be a problem, according to pyschologist Doroth�e Carwel, an expert on the subject. "One parent, one language is an excellent idea-but it has to be followed closely. If mum or dad mix languages, especially when talking to a young child, this can cause confusion." And in Jesper's family where does his native Danish come in? "I hope that will come later but the child pyschologists we spoke to said that three languages at once was asking a lot of a normal child. I've got Dutch and Russian friends who've also had to accept that but not very happily. Anyway, we didn't want Fred speaking English, French and Danish but all of them badly. The result we've got is ideal, I think"

"Bilingual by 6 or 7"

I got agreement on this from Eva Faber-Hibou, English, married to a French doctor and living just outside of Aix-en-Provence. She runs a discussion group on bilingualism associated with the Anglo-American Group of Provence. "Jesper and his wife seem to have got it right. We're raising our daughter that way and she sounds more or less like a native in both languages. But this matter shouldn't be oversimplified. Every child is different, and there's a major distinction between one who's brought into France after spending his or her earlier years in the U.K. or the U.S., for example, and one who's actually born here. The first case can be quite difficult. There's a whole lot of psychological problems involved. On the one hand, some kids are anxious to adapt quickly to the language of their new peers while others are less amenable. But there's lots of evidence that learning and using two languages usually have a positive effect on childrens' overall intellectual development. Then, you can get hang-ups if their command of the new language comes to outstrip that of their parents-as it often does. As far as assessing a child's progress is concerned, if he or she is born and brought up here bilingual ability should be achieved by age six or seven, but don't be too demanding-oral comprehension and oral participation are much easier to achieve than written fluency which often requires a lot of formal training."

"A great plus these days"

And that brings in school. Eva Faber-Hibou again: "The choice that has to be made is between the French system and an international school. Plunge your child into �ducation nationale and he or she may have a rough time at first. I'd say it takes most kids about a year to feel comfortable in a foreign-language school. A lot depends on the attitude of the teachers. Some are solicitous and very helpful, others offer what I can only call an attitude of malign neglect. And you can get problems with English teachers. They aren't happy if some cheeky young Brit or American corrects their often dubious pronunciation. Where the international schools are concerned, they obviously give immense help in keeping up a child's level of English. Hopefully, this will not be at the expense of a developing fluency in French. When there seems to be a risk of this it's up to parents to expose their children to the language as much as possible. To be able to say truthfully in a C.V. that you're bilingual is a great plus these days."

� Collete Brunton

Set as favourite

Bookmark

Comments (0)