To breed or not to breed?

Written by Riviera Reporter

France comes second to Ireland as the EU country which produces the most children. Your average female Dupont has 1.9 children (against a mere 1.3 born by her Italian sister next door). One reason offered to explain this is the long-standing tradition of generous social benefits for those with children but there's another factor, we'd suggest: French parents try to minimise the misery that young children can bring to the life of a couple. The point was made, inadvertently, by an American mother writing in the Weekly Telegraph who noted "the huge gap between Anglo-Saxon parenting and parenting French-style. The French shout more, slap more and enforce manners. They largely believe that children should be seen and not heard".

Even given this, Corinne Maier - a provoking writer who earlier produced a book about how to keep a job while doing a minimum of work (she was a fonctionnaire) - has just published No Kid: Quarante raisons de ne pas avoir d'enfant (France: Michalon). Couples, and especially women, should resist the pressure to parenthood. Some of her forty reasons: kids are boring, cost a lot of money, limit freedom (including that to pursue a career), interfere with the couple's sex life and, very often, grow up to disappoint. According to the publisher's handout, Ms Maier has two children, both girls, aged 10 and 13. Wonder what they think of Mum?

From Riviera Reporter 124, Dec 2007/Jan 2008

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written by Derek F , 16 April 2008

"The French shout more, slap more and enforce manners. They largely believe that children should be seen and not heard".
In other words, enforce a little discipline. So nice to see, instead of some dimwitted bimbo letting her brats destroy whatever they want, as in UK.
It came as such a pleasant surprise to be greeted with a cordial smile and a "Bonjour" by the local kids. Respect breeds respect, not suspicion and ill-will. Give me responsible French parenting every time and freedom from the "liberal" trendies who want to tear down every vestige of correct behaviour.

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written by Sly , 17 April 2008

To be honest, each time I return to the UK I am shocked by the public misbehaviour of many children. It seems like they are ruling the roost, not their parents. But perhaps this is because UK law "protects" them too much? I heard of a case where visiting French parents slapped their unruly child in a restaurant (I think it was in Scotland) and they were reported to the police.
No one would condone child-beating but some firm discipline goes a long way. Spare the rod and spoil the child.

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written by Mike Preston , 18 April 2008

I strongly agree that one of the areas where French culture beats most 'Anglo' cultures hands down is in the way children are integrated into family life in France and as such tend to grow up politer and more respectful than their Anglo counterparts.

On the few occasions when I've reprimanded French kids for unsociable behaviour, I've been pleasantly surprised by their response, whereas in the UK as often as not I'd be tempted to ignore it for fear of being set upon. I realise that this in itself could give rise to a self fulfilling prophecy, but there are many documented cases where this has happened, even resulting in death.

I am appalled by the behaviour and language of kids as young as three and four in the UK .... and I don't go to the worst areas either!

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written by Panda Eyes , 24 April 2008

The UK is full of kids doing all the things we were told not to do. Why is it that discipline seems so lacking in the UK these days? As far back as about 25 yrs ago, I remember some friends of ours saying how their small children were scribbling all over their walls and they, the parents, were helpless to do anything as it was supposedly considered "artistic" of the children to do so and thus they should be allowed to express their artistic sides, and, to top it all, they weren't allowed to smack the children for defacing their walls. Well, puh-lease - do me a favour!!!

When I was a child, I was told don't do this or don't do that, and I didn't - if I did, I got punished, not necessarily hit in any way, but not allowed to do this or that as a result. These days, kids are more likely to tell their parents to f*** off and the parents are expected to take it!

I seem to remember that in the UK, children under 18 (?) can even "divorce" their parents - perish the thought... Does the same apply in France? I don't know, but I somehow highly doubt it.

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